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Come and wake me up
Just kiss me
Like angels' breath
So softly
When my eyes open
I'll touch your cheek
And I'll wonder
While I feel so weak
A smile will spread
Across my waking lips
As I struggle to remember
Why I deserve this
I will pull you close
Place my arms around you
Watch the sun in your eyes
And try to believe this is true
And with a pinch
One that feels so mean
I will hurt myself
To test if this is a dream
And when it hurts so right
Everything will be wonderful
I'll know it's real
And that life is beautiful

Gah! The ice cream was melted

Just can't catch a break…

Some of the things that I write have a strange way of coming true.
That makes me a little wary of actually writing things down
sometimes. Something I wrote a few months is clawing it's way to
truthfulness at an alarming pace. It's one of those things I knew
would happen, but it's not supposed to happen just yet, and…
well… it has a way of complicating things that shouldn't be
complicated.

That's not entirely true. Life is meant to be complicated I think.
Especially mine. It has always been a peg up in the realms of weird
and hard over most people I know.

I got good news last night. That was obviously followed up by bad
news today. That's just the cycle that's happening right now. It's
viscious and evil, but it's mine, and I'm okay with it for now.
I decided to write something last night. It's a special deviation
from my normal writing style specifically for someone very important
to me. I'm just afraid of how sad it will be

Whenever I write something amazing. Something people can connect
with. Something that showcases my talents at their best, it is sad.
I was once told that I write sad well. It's true I guess. I hope
that someday I can write happy well. I'd rather bring smiles and
tears of joy to people and connect with them on that level than I
would make them feel sad.

That said, I am still looking forward to writing it. I have part of
it in my head already. It has an obvious progression to it.

My old writing teacher always used to say that you have write about
the things that you know and that you understand. I've had a lot of
experience with sadness. There have been a lot of wonderful and
amazing things happen in my life. Unfortunately there have been more
negative things that have happened. Guy that I am, I try to be
positive about everything. The world gets a little heavy for me once
in a while though.

I'm looking forward to my friend Amanda's wedding this summer. My
friend Valerie is getting married this summer too. All around me
people are getting married. I hope to join that crowd someday. I
think I have a lot to offer someone. I just need to find someone who
can both see it and is interested in it.

There was a slight scheduling conflict with the wedding dates after
moving and starting my new job, but I got that all sorted out.
Quebec doesn't have an August long weekend, and yes, that is weird.
It does have a June long weekend which would be the ideal time to
head to New York.

I want to go. I don't want to go. I want to go. I don't want to go.
I just don't know what I'll do for all of the time that I'd be alone
in New York and wigged out of my skin. I could probably find a
theatre somewhere to catch up on movies or something. I know there
are a million things to do there. Perhaps I'll ask some people I
know who have been there before and see what they have to say.
I should wait for the “Special Project” do be done before I go. At
the same time I should go before the end of July. It's a “Black Box”
operation There's probably only one other person out there who
could possibly get that.

Argh! Gasp! It's soo hot in the office today. Some days they just
don't run the AC. I don't know why yet. It could sure be used today
though. It's so hot I can't think straight, and that makes me
unproductive. When I'm unproductive I get bored. When I get bored I
don't work much. I guess that's why I'm writing this.

One more hour and I can go home. I have some ice cream waiting for
me in the fridge